A Breakfast Recipe for Fellow Idiots

This blog isn't about recipes. But occasionally, I will share some, including some of my own.

And by "some of my own," I mean one. Maybe two.

So here it is, the breakfast I eat every day because I am CONSISTENT, NOT PREDICTABLE, as someone recently explained to me.

I don't even have a name for this recipe. I mean, shit. It's just my breakfast.

Welp, there you have it: that's the name: It's Just My Breakfast.

IT'S JUST MY BREAKFAST

Ingredients:

1/2 cup quick oats
1 cup water
1 square Ghirardelli chocolate (I like dark, but milk will work too)
Walnuts (eyeball it, bitches)
Frozen blueberries (ditto)

Wow, I sound all official, don't I?

I took pictures of this freaking process. I'm not a professional photographer and trying to get them done without shadows and shit was a major pain-in-the-ass and they only came out so-so. But I'm sharing them anyway.

Directions:

Dump 1/2 cup quick oats in a microwave-safe bowl.

Add a cup of water.

Put bowl in the microwave and set for 1.5 minutes (1:30). Note: I have no idea what wattage or setting my microwave is on...the first time you do this, stand by and keep your eye on the gruel so it doesn't cook over.

Take out and give that sucker a stir.

Lick spoon (but only after blowing on it).

SORRY NO PICTURE FOR THAT YOU FILTHY-MINDED PEOPLE.

Put bowl back in microwave and nuke for another 30 seconds.

Take bowl out.

Pour some frozen blueberries on it. How much? I dunno. It probably ends up being a 1/2 cup to a cup? You can use any frozen fruit you like. I've done frozen strawberries and frozen medleys, but I find the blueberries work best. They're small enough so they thaw a bit with the hot oatmeal, creating a magical mouth feel. And who wouldn't want a magical mouth feel in the morning? Maybe THAT should be the name of the recipe: YOUR MORNING MAGICAL MOUTH FEEL

Pour some walnuts on top. Again, eyeball.

Chop up a square of chocolate and add. I use the pointed heel of a paring knife and give the chocolate square a few good bangs on a hard surface (while still in the package) to break it up.

(Editor's note: Be careful with the knife, folks. That shit is sharp.)

Stir and enjoy.

Is it a law that all recipe writers need to include all the fat, protein, points, etc? If it is, then I am breaking it.

Honestly, I have no idea. All I know is that this is a hearty and healthful meal that keeps me satisfied for a good long time (which is saying a lot for me).

Blueberries have antioxidants (LOL -- whatever those are). Walnuts are good fat (I'm just repeating stuff I've heard now). Dark chocolate has something that I forget the name of. Oatmeal is fiber. I think?

If you try it, let me know what you think. But only if you like it. ;)